She saw it coming around the corner of her eye. As a large hand held grasp of her pale face, as she cold not breath as fainted in the grasp of the blury figure, she could not see clearly anymore, all she could see, was as she lost her breath as a of a grin on a blury figure stood above her, as her vision faded away, as she collapsed of the spiky bedding of grass bellow her. As the moon arisen, into to the faint sunset of the sky above... As her vision regained as she found herself in a old sack that smelt like old potatoes.
"where am i?" she mumbled, as her breath got heavier, as the sack moved a tumbled on its side as she felt like she was on a some sort of truck as she opened the sack a slight bit she finally breath properly as she felt like she was in a dark mass of void as she tried to opened the sack fully, but as the track stopped she heard some voices that were heading her way as she went back into the sack... As the back doors of the truck opened...
to be continued...
Monday, August 6, 2018
1 comment:
Comments
Please structure your comments as follows:
Positive - Something done well
Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what they had to say
Helpful - Give some ideas for next time or Ask a question you want to know more about
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Tyra, you wrote such a suspenseful story. I do hope that you continue it in another blog post.
ReplyDeleteMake sure that you are using a full stop or another sentence ending type of punctuation to avoid run on sentences. Some of your sentences are too long. This will help improve the reader's experience of your writing.
- Miss Birtch